I have been every busy and such but I shouldn’t ignore my blog. Things have been more than just a bit stressful and I am not talking Mario Brothers here. There is this wall and it appears I have hit it at the full force of me trying to hold my life together amid the chacos. Today I was overcome by anxiety and I had to go visit my doctor who has put me on bed rest for the week. Sure it’s a few days away from “working” but it has seemed that work has been the most sane part of my world.
My doctor asked me if I felt like hurting myself and I laughed because it just seems so absurd to me because I am fighting so hard to live. But they need to ask questions about that to make sure and while I feel like giving up occasionally the end is not what I seek. I want a garden and chickens, and a home where I can paint the walls any color I want. I crave the earth under my feet and the sun above me and the rain that washes me and the wind that lifts me up. Conversations with friends and smiles on faces and the sharing of pie.
Thanks for reading my ramblings and I value your thoughts and well wishing. If you wish to help me with the missing happy I totally love plants and flowers for in my garden. My wish is to get some pots and plants some lettuces and some basil.